Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Inevitable and Unavoidable

Yes, we have been anticipating it for, well, years, really. Expecting it for a year and a half, certainly.

At 6:22 am, today, CST it happened.

We hit and killed a deer.

(Really, Jamie, I am not trying to copy you.)

Tootling along the Highway 69, just past Monroe, sipping coffee, listening to the news (NPR, natch) I make the fatal comment that apparently needed punishing by the gods:

"Wow, we're making really good time. Almost too good."

I really do know better. It was just a slip of the lip, but there the words hung and I couldn't take them back.

No more than a minute later, we saw them as we flew along at 60 mph, on our side of the road, coming up from a deep, broad ditch, the two of them. The lead Bambi paused, gathering strength, as we slowed as much as we safely could, her companion pausing at her shoulder. Then, truly seeming in super-slo-mo, she leapt, landing smack-dab in front of us.

Through the air, she flew, landing with the scripted thud. The look of disbelief on her companion's face was clear. Apparently, they always knew she was not the brightest in the herd, but, jeez, they always thought she was at least smarter than Doris, who lay down the road, an orange spray-paint mark on her belly, awaiting disposal from the efficient road-kill crew.

Of note, last year, the state of Wisconsin had planned to ax the program that takes care of clearing carcasses from the sides of the roads. Thankfully, this did not come to pass, and animal corpses rarely remain there for more than 48 hours.

So now, the little, black car has a very symmetric dent in the hood, which will not open, and we get to pay the deductible on the insurance and get the hood replaced. We hope that is all the damage. The lights are OK and the airbags didn't deploy. We are both fine and the deer is not suffering, presumably now in a better, safer place, where she will not feel confused by the fast moving, bright lights. Still, we feel sad.

Finally, to continue Jamie's tally, Machine:2, Nature:0


Edited to say: Well, the poor little car is now admitted to the car hospital with a fractured radiator in addition to the abrasions and contusions. Expensive diagnostic tests are being arranged and surgery is scheduled. Anticipated discharge is in one week. I am a bit non-plussed to say that our insurance company has been amazing. They quickly arranged the repairs and the rental car. The grandson of the rep Charles talked to is a student at his school. (The company is headquartered in the town we work.) See, here everybody does know everyone. Not always a bad thing.



Blogger Teri said...

Yikes! I'm glad you're okay. So sorry about the little car...

10:42 AM  
Blogger Cagey said...

What? You didn't take the deer to your local butcher? Or is that just a Kansas thing?

11:59 AM  
Blogger Diana said...

Teri- Yes, it is sad, all smooshed in.

Cagey- Excuse me while I giggle at the image of the big old deer strapped to the roof, legs flapping in the wind, ropes through the windows, sitting there in the parking lot at the school (Charles drops me off). The car is probably minimally larger than the deer. Nope, not a Kansas thing. Very Wisconsin, too. Waste not, want not.

2:04 PM  
Blogger Rozanne said...

I just hope no one else on my blogroll hits a deer this week.

Glad you are OK and the deer died instantly (she did, right?)

7:20 PM  
Blogger moegirl said...

Yikes, hope she has no connection to those fearsome Wisconsin Deer gangs. You don't want any bucks looking for a little payback.

7:27 PM  
Blogger Jamie said...

Oh NO. Oh no oh no. Well, (as I keep trying to remind myself about my "incident"), the important thing is you're okay. I am so glad you came out of it as well as you did.

Hunting season is a b*tch, apparently.

I also echo what Rozanne said. No one else hit a deer! We are NOT trying to make the trifecta here.

10:49 PM  
Blogger Babs said...

Fortunately for me, deer don't tend to jump in front of any MTA buses.

Plus we haven't had any deer on this island for, like, 20 years.

Of course, now that I've said that, the one damned deer that swam over from Jersey will pop right out if I hop on the bus today.


I shouldn't have said anything.

7:57 AM  
Blogger Diana said...

Rozanne- I echo that. I kept thinking "Well, that makes two. Where's the third?" Yes. DOA. Thankfully.

Stacy- Oh, no. I forgot about the gangs. This was a-ways from our house, so here's hoping she was from a rival gang. Maybe that will be seen as a peace offering by our thugs?

Jamie- Thanks and yes, the important thing is WE are just fine. Just so many deer around, now, just like the racoons and possums and feral cats, but the smaller furry things just don't do the damage, unless you swerve, lock your brakes and end up in the ditch. Charles handled the whole thing well. He braked as much as he safely could on the highway, but did not swerve, so we did not end up in the ditch or in the incomming traffic lane. Nor were we rear-ended.

Babs- Did you learn nothing from the above? The gods do not take those who take things for granted lightly. Please promise me you will wear a seatbelt (use the belt of your coat and run it through the back of the bus seat and over your shoulder. A crash helmet might also be of use on the bus. That deer is now gunning for you. Please don't make the third of us. (Wait a second. Jersey has deer? Talk about some scary mothers they must be!)

8:36 AM  
Blogger CarpeDM said...

I think we might be safe, folks. I hit a deer (well, okay, someone else hit the deer and I was a passenger in the car behind that car). So technically, you could see this as being 3. Of course, my deer was about oh, 15 years ago? Does that count? Probably not.

If you get bored, you might want to check out the post. It is probably one of the best posts I'd ever written. And I say that in all modesty as well. I called it D'oh! A deer. Yes, I am brilliant, aren't I? Oh. Yeah, modesty is not really my thing. http://greenduckies.blogspot.com/2004/12/doh-deer.html

Diana, seriously, I am glad you are okay and that the car can be fixed.

1:58 PM  
Blogger The Lioness said...

yes, I believe I have pointed you in DM's Deer Post's direction bfr - be sure to take the Dramamine w you. Quite.

Oy, that was a got of a deer eh? The poor thing. Bless them.

9:08 AM  

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