Thursday, March 23, 2006

Thursday Night

Hello, Dearest Darlings,

And how have you been?

Really? How dreadful! Or do I mean shocking? Lovely? What's the word I'm looking for? Oh! Interesting! That's a good all-purpose one. Because I really am interested.

Well, since you asked: Wet. And a bit smelly. Of dog.

You see, we washed the dog tonight. First time since we took her home, actually, and that was about 40+ lbs ago (20 kg-ish for the civilized world). The occasion? Ah. She is going in for her operation to become an "it" tomorrow. Well, both the pup and the kit, actually. It's just that one smells horribly of dog piss and one smells vaguely of kitten crunchies.

Clearly a bath was in order.

Now, we've bathed dogs before. We've had 2 prior German Shepherds. Yes. Something to be planned and dreaded and fortified beforehand with something bracing.

Tonight, we chose a ceremonial margarita to steel our nerves, as we had the ingredients on hand. Lovely.

The tub filled was with water, a large pile of big, old, sad towels at the ready. Bathroom door shut to prevent horrible things happening to the rest of the house should she get by both of us and through the door.

Charles tossed her into the tub and we braced ourselves for the worst.

She adored it.

No way. Really. She started drinking the bathwater, wagging her tail as he poured water over her with a large, plastic, ricotta cheese container. He lathered her. She made a token lunge or two to get out, but it was more of an attempt to climb into his lap to thank him, I think. He sudsed her, I stood there, basically superfluous, passing shampoo and such. He rinsed her. She snapped at the globs of fur floating in the water, trying to eat them. Then, she started pawing at them, with delight.

At the end, I toweled her as she repeatedly tried to escape. Well, make that climb back into the tub.

What the hell?

We've never had a pet; dog, cat, or fish, who wanted a bath.

At the end, we stood blinking at each other as she raced around the house in sheer glee. We finally had to shut her in her crate, next to the heat vent, to mellow her out.

I cleaned the bathroom, now basically covered in splashes of water and dog undercoat. Sadly, the bathroom I had cleaned a few hours ago. (Clearly, planning is not my strong point.)

Charles is now downstairs with the kids, watching a movie. The puppy is in her crate, longing for the bath. (Obviously, I am here, telling the tale to you.)

And I wondered why I always had to keep shooing her out of there when bathing the kids. The cat, she avoids the place like the plague.

Apparently, tonight, Molly realized a life long dream.

Good to give your pets a bit of joy before going under the knife, eh?

Guess who'll have the best time of all at the beach this summer?

Wish them well, tomorrow, please. We are rather fond of the furry ones.

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19 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is VERY funny! I have a cat that used to love baths. Then she wised up! Hope the snips went well. I can take the stitches out if you want me to!

10:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Where are the before and after pics?? We want to see your cute little (big) furball all cleaned up for her big day! I just thought of something. She may never allow you to bathe her again. She may associate it with the big "snip snip". What am I saying? She is a DOG!

10:25 PM  
Blogger moegirl said...

Best of luck to the furry ones. My childhood dog Little Bear adored baths as well- some dogs are funny that way, but he enjoyed affection and attention of any kind.

11:36 PM  
Blogger Coffee-Drinking Woman said...

I've known dogs that liked to swim, but non that liked baths. (shakes head in astonishment)

3:39 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

My kittens still aren't old/big enough for "their big day" at the vet's office. One vet told me she won't "speuter" until they're at least 4 pounds, and another told me she won't do it until they're at least 16 weeks, so we've still got a couple of weeks to wait. I'll be thrilled to have it over with... in a household of lesbians, all these testicles are disconcerting.

4:09 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ahhh, spring is in the air because it's time to neuter and spay your pets! ;)

We had dogs that loved their baths and got one every week. We had dogs that hated them. We've also had cats that liked to join us in the shower for a quick rinse... very strange!

Currently, our cat gets a bath every two months. She hates it, but she's becoming more resigned to it. My mother in law's cat doesn't mind the actual bath, but she hates being wet afterwards. How silly!

Good luck to the "other" children.

10:43 AM  
Blogger Cagey (Kelli Oliver George) said...

Too cute! I want a dog and reading about yours doesn't help. Although, I had forgotten about the "bath" part.

Anyway, my own fur-free kid took his first "real" bath the other night and loved it, too.

Keep us posted on your little fur babies and how they come out of their "clip 'n snips" today.

11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have given my dog a bath once since we adopted him last April. He thought he was being punished! He was shaking so bad and kept trying to get out. Then he sat in the corner while we dried him. poor baby!

He goes the a groomer now. They are able to better facilitate my soon-to-be 50 pounder!

My kitty hates baths. absolutely hates them. all I can say is, thank GOD we got her declawed (but she still has teeth). I am going to videotape the next time we give her a bath so everyone can see the drowned rat!

have a great weekend!!

11:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for the beach "heads-up". I will keep my eye on the kids and let one of you monitor the beast. I remember Colin in the surf last time--I still have the picture on my desktop picture file in Yahoo! (Recommend a strong leash--I have about 75' or 3/4" rope in the garage to bring if needed.) I remember bathing a cat years ago. Will not ever do that again. I figure an animal has a tongue, so use it.

The Crotchety Ole RFer

1:19 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Warm fuzzy hugs to the warm fuzzy ones on their scary day. And best of luck to mom with 2 whiney furballs to take care of all weekend. Ah, the pup is so goofy she probably won't notice anything's wrong. However, I fully expect Mad-kitties sensibilities to be disturbed by the events.

2:16 PM  
Blogger Rozanne said...

I can totally picture the scene!!!

Bummer about having just cleaned the bathroom a few hours before, though. I'm sure you've learned your lesson on that one.

When we first moved to PDX, I noticed that there were a lot of "dog wash" businesses, and I thought that was weird, as I'd never seen them in Chicago. Do you have them in Wisc? I think we have them here cuz lots of people take their dogs out hiking on muddy trails.

3:43 PM  
Blogger Diana said...

Kate- Freaky kitty! We've bathed ours only once, within minutes of bringing her home. Hanging out with the "other" puppies, she had her share if shit all over her. Poor baby.

Colleen- If I can manage it, I'll post a picture or two of the poor things tomorrow. She was still trying to get back to the tub, last night, a few hours after the bath. Yes. She's a dog.

Stacy- Little Bear sounds wonderful.

Teri- Me either, although I've only had 3.

Leigh-Ann- You know, I've never had a male pet, dog or cat. Disconcerting, indeed, although short lived. (Sounds like the kittens are all to stay. Goody!) Our vet does them at 5 months but I don't recall he had a weight limit. Kitty is certainly less than 4 lbs, dainty thing. Pup was a hair shy of 50 lbs and will be 5 months tomorrow. It was a trick getting her into her crate in the back of the van, today.

Ariella- Ah, yes. Love, thwarted love. Both pets are obsessed with the shower. Someday, someone is getting a surprise when we accidently turn the water on, not knowing they are in there.

Cagey- Awww! Bath babies! The best. OK; for you to mutter under your breath: Chewed shoes, going out in the middle of the night to pee, "accidents" on the carpet, vomit piles from ingesting roughly 18 lbs of grass, poop balls a-dangling, stealing food from the counters or the table, the constant nipping of a teething puppy (oh, I will be glad when that's over)...

Did that help? If not, I can send Molly over for a visit. (She is getting better; thank goodness puppyhood is relatively short.)

Amy- Oh, poor thing. I hate it when they are shaking. Molly was shaking when I left her. Guilt. Oh, the guilt. 18 hours and we can get them back. You will be sharing the pictures, of course?

Dad- Thankfully, kitty does a lovely job of keeping herself clean. I'll let you know about the rope.

Christie- Oh, they will be pathetic, won't they. Mad is sure to hold a grudge. In preparation, I ran our Saturday errands today, with both kids and no Charles. (Colin had the day off.) Started great, but Sara had a complete 40 mega-ton meltdown in the checkout line of the grocery store. I'm still shaking.

4:04 PM  
Blogger Diana said...

Rozanne- You know, I've not see one here. I do remember seeing them in PDX. Yes. It was disappointing. I hate cleaning the bathroom more than any other regular household chore.

4:07 PM  
Blogger Coffee-Drinking Woman said...

There's a dog wash business fairly near my kids school. I've never seen another one, though.

7:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope your kids have passed "their big day" with flying colours! As for male vs. female pets, I always had female dogs because I didn't want male dogs lifting their legs on things in the yard, in the house, etc. I didn't realize that leg-lifting was a learned behaviour though, and so the one male dog we have now squats like a girl. We don't take him to dog parks as we don't want the other boys to laugh at him.

As for cats, we have five boys and two girls. If I can make a generalization, the girls seem more independent and seem to have more natural aptitude for hunting/stalking the various wild toys around the house. The boys seem more content to nap, and like to hog the remote control to channel surf.

Yes, all the kittens are staying... I'm a sucker. I'll write a blog entry about it soon.

3:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Leigh Ann -- leg lifting is a learned behavior. We had a male scotty who was neutered at the very earliest and he always squatted like a girl. Oh, the mocking that occurred.

Diana -- funny story for you. When my mother was younger, she had two siamese cats (Frick and Frack) who had a game wherein they would race up the stairs, into the bathroom and jump in the tub to slide around the porcelain.

So, one day, my mother was drawing a bath for herself, left the door open and went into the bedroom to get something. The cats decided, hey! this would be a great time to play our game because mom is upstairs! And then: depression set in.

She said they hid under the bed for an entire day before their humiliation would allow them to come out.

7:25 AM  
Blogger Diana said...

Teri- Maybe it is a more urban phenomenon? We hicksters just keep 'em smelly because, like, why bother?

Leigh-Ann- Charles is heading out to get them as I type. I had no idea that leg lifting was learned. We chose female dogs as we wanted our dogs to be maternal around our kids. Maia certainly was. Emma, had she lived was becoming so. Molly, well, we'll see. She is in that 5 month-old 'trying' stage. Give her a year. I'm thrilled the kitties are staying.

Ariella- That story is hilarious! Poor, poor humiliated kitties. Hard to pass that one off as *ahem* intentional.

9:58 AM  
Blogger CarpeDM said...

Poor babies. I'm sorry that I missed this post but at least now I know that they are home safe.

1:50 AM  
Blogger brooksba said...

I'm going to get to the post about the vet visit, but I had to smile with the story of the bath. We had a dog that loved to stand up and drink bathwater. And he didn't have a problem with baths. In fact, he hopped in the tub a few times when it wasn't his turn for a bath.

5:35 AM  

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